“We’re terribly sorry that we expected you to conform to the safety standards of the United States when we made a multi-million dollar manufacturing agreement. It is our fault that you refused to properly inspect your outgoing products, and your lack of concern over crap your ship to other nations for cash is so great. We also apologize for your horrible human rights record, that employees in your factories work 6 10-hour days, and that any dissent is crushed and rewarded with a bullet in the head.

Again, it’s all Mattel’s fault.”

Oh, if such a letter were actually true. Instead, they apologized for including some OK products in the massive toy recall.