Bad Jokes = Human Rights Violation

Canadian comic Guy Earle is under siege!  Some lesbian hecklers at one of his shows are accusing him of violating their human rights by saying some of the things he did at the show to them.  The initial complain was heard in a preliminary hearing by humorless autocrat Heather MacNaughton (who worked over Mark Steyn), who ruled there was enough evidence to convene a trial.

From what I understand, this is all over heckling.  The lesbians say he crossed a line.  But seriously, folks, if you go to a comedy club and start shouting “You suck” at a comedian– you get what’s coming to you.  If you can’t laugh at the jokes, don’t.  But if you start heckling, you’re exposing yourselves to ridicule– and that’s exactly what they got.  And I heard Earle’s ridicule, and it’s funny.  Really really funny.

Does Canada really have to waste money dragging Guy Earle into a court to determine if he is a Human Rights Violator?  Come on– he’s a comic.  And a funny one.  Stop wasting time with this and let him get back to making people laugh.  An art some people (do you hear me Heather MacNaughton?) seem to have lost.

(I bet she’ll giggle if you call Bush Chimpy McDrinkerHitlerson.)

Hillary Does Shots

I know, not a lot of substance lately, so to make up for it.. more fluff in the form of Crown Royal-shooting Hillary

And my personal rendition of the new “3 AM Phone Call After a Few Shots of Crown”:

*Phone rings* *hand grabs for receiver, drops it twice, then picks it up*

HC: Whaddya want?

Chief of Staff: Madame President, we have a situation in South America.

HC: Well I’ve got a situation here! I need more BOOZE!

CoS: Um, can you repeat that?

HC: Youallthink… youallthink I’m too SOFT. Well, Jim beam think’s I’m nice and hard!

CoS: Madame President, what the hell does that mean?

HC: Hold on… *door opens* *pounding techno music and people shouting* Woooooo hoooo! Shots all around!

CoS: Madame President? I can barely hear you.

HC: Who’s the PREEZZZ? Oh..uhoh.. *Bleaarrrgghhhh*

Darth Obama

He’s got the Jedi Mind Trick down.

The Huckabee Post

Mike Huckabee, UberRino, has a new website coming out.  He’s got a neat timer on it.

I think he’s going to launch a website with a bunch of evangelical bloggers riffing on all things current, with a Jesus-playin-my-guitar twist.

Sounds unlikely, but just look at what Arianna’s done with a bunch of liberal bloggers riffing on all things current, with a Clinton-smokin’-my-bong twist.

Baraka Obama

I just had to see if any people had done a parody of Barack Obama with the Mortal Combat fighter Baraka, the guy with swords in his arms.

Well, I wasn’t the only one.  There are two video mashups on YouTube.  Here’s the links:

The good one.

The bad one.  (Although it’s got the Mortal Kombat theme, which, of course, is awesome.)

Both have Barack giving the ol’ “Fatality” to Hillary.

Well, here’s my contribution to web “fan” art.  I present, Baraka Obama!

You know, if he cuts off McCain’s head during the debate, I’m sure he’ll get a bump in the polls.  And once he gets arrested, Gore can take over and run to the White House unopposed!

My first dedication

And it comes from Willy over at Lose Tn Canon. Oops, did I misspell the name?

I love the picture.  So perfect an illustration of Willy’s endearing nuttiness.

WARNING: The link has profanity.

And it all stems from our little comment war on this post.

Quote of the Day

From tonight’s “House”:

House:  I know how to kill a man with my thumb!

Cuddy:  Who doesn’t!? 

Ron Paul Theme Song!

Ron Paul’s co-opted “New York, New York” for his campaign. I’ve got a better song with new improved lyrics! Take it away, BOC!

**********************

With a purposeful grimace and a terrible sound
He pulls the GOP credibility down

Helpless people on Fox & Friends
Scream bug-eyed as he looks in on them

He watches “Loose Change” and doesn’t back down
As his goons spam polls to give him the internet crown

Oh no, they say hes got to go
Go go Ron Paul, yeah
Oh no, there goes ‘Conspirio’
Go go Ron Paul, yeah

Rinji news o moshiagemasu!
Rinji news o moshiagemasu!
Ron ポールは別のインターネットの投票に勝った!
Daishkyu hinan shite kudasai!
Daishkyu hinan shite kudasai!

Oh no, they say hes got to go
Go go Ron Paul, yeah
Oh no, there goes ‘Conspirio’
Go go godzilla, yeah

History shows again and again
How wacky loners mess up nominations
Ron Paul!

Iowahawk in ‘08

Looks like his campaign is picking up steam. If he does get elected, well, I’ll just have to push my bid for President until 2016. Then I can trounce Jeff Goldstein in the primary and roll into the Presidency to construct the National Monument to the Ho-Ho Snack Cake.

Here’s my bumper sticker supporting Burge:

Something scary in Dallas

It’s something that makes you think:

Police are still taking inventory of all the weapons seized. Among those discovered were two AK-47 rifles, an Uzi 9 millimeter submachine gun, a TEC-9 submachine gun, a 40 millimeter ordnance launcher, a handheld ordnance launcher, and about 500 rounds of ammunition.

The tenet left during the police search and hasn’t been seen since.

Authorities tell us the tenant travels to the Middle East frequently and just returned from there this morning.

Well, the editor caught one of the misspellings, but missed the first “tenet”. It does make the story very amusing, though, in a weird sort of way. Let me substitute the definition.

The a religious doctrine that is proclaimed as true without proof left during the police search and hasn’t been seen since.

Some days I wish I had an editor. And other days, I drink wine!